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Re: We are really not 'gay'

> This is why folks doing AIDS prevention talks refer to "MSM's," or "men who
> have sex with men" rather than using the terms "gay" or "bisexual."  That way
> they can discuss the risks of specific sexual practices without having people
> exclude themselves because they don't identify with the labels.

That designation has efficacy for their prevention talks, but is
dangerous if exported to define an identity. MSM excludes the
thousands of gay men who haven't had sex with men ever, and many more
thousands who have not had sex with men for a very long time, but
still know how their body is plumbed.  A healthy understanding of
sexuality sees sexuality as integral to identity  but not definitive
of identity.  MSN is not an identity.  LESBIAN and GAY are
identities.  I am as gay when darning a sock, cooking a chocolate
mousse, or praying at the altar as I am at conjugal glory moments.
Thanks be to God!

We remove the fig leaf not to gawk, but to see the statue whole.

I have the same problem with Kinsey's behavioral definition of
homosexuals.  Plumbing is much better understood by how it is designed
than by how it is used.  Patterns of involuntary arousal tell much
more about sexual orientation than do patterns of sexual performance.
In a heterosexist culture there are many, many pressures to make
sexual performance be out of synch with patterns of sexual arousal --
not to mention other extraneous influences that sometimes inhibit gay
sexual performance, such as illness, isolation, old age, early
adolescence after puberty, calls to celibacy....

I named the organization INTEGRITY for a purpose, to claim our right
and our obligation to live as we were created, as integers, as whole

        Collect for an X-Rated World

     Creator God, for whom all hearts are already open, all
     desires are known, and from whom no secrets are ever
     hidden, thank you for not turning out the lights when
     you made each of our parts.

     Thank you for all the wondrous gifts we're not supposed
     to talk about, for the first person who kissed us with
     mouth open, for angels we've entertained unawares, for
     hair caught in our teeth, for bright clouds reflected on a
     lover's iris....

     Help us to live as whole persons, to love the world as
     much as you do, to do justice, love mercy, and walk
     humbly in your sight.  AMEN

          --H.R.H.Q.L (a.k.a. LC)

Joy to you.


Louie Crew, 377 S. Harrison St., #12D, East Orange, NJ 07018-1225
http://newark.rutgers.edu/~lcrew   973-395-1068

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